Being $250,000 in debt (w/ $4 in my bank account) at 24 was the best thing that could’ve happened to me.

There is a missing piece of the life puzzle that I haven’t shared with you because I was too ashamed to put it out there. And it all happened in 2015. I almost lost it all.

This story expands on an article I wrote not to long ago titled “It’s time to slow the fuck down.”

With it being a sunny and warm day in Toronto — I like to take some time to critically look back on my personal and professional life and who it’s made me today so I can continue to move into the future. Without making the same fuck ups I’ve done in the past.

To help you keep an open mind, here’s the view from my home office that I almost lost. But now I am grateful that I have it.

Many say that millennials are entitled and just because the stats prove this to be true. Let it be known that there are those who don’t fit this mold. Every individual comes from different backgrounds and experiences but we rarely want to share it because let’s be real, “it fucking sucks” when everyone around you is being praised for their “successes” and we’re stuck busting our asses to never achieve their level at the velocity they are going at. Because we come from nothing.

Here’s my story with the goal to break the mold that we are all humans and deserve equal standing in our voices.
(My birthday is in December if you are confused with the age and years.)

Let’s start with the numbers from back in 2015 when it all went to hell:

1. Mortgage (purchased at 21 years old in 2012): Valued at $319 000 with $80 000 down = -$239 000. Over 3 years of payments up to 2015 equated to approximately -$225 000 on the principal. Yes, this is ‘good’ debt but it’s still debt plus a roof over my head.
2. Credit cards: -$16 000
3. Student loans: -$12 000
4. Bank account: $4
5. Leased car payments (faulted for last 3 months): $460 x 3 months=-$1380
6. Property taxes (faulted for 6 months): -$2000
7. Maintenance fees (faulted for 3 months): -$600
8. Phone / Internet / Utilities (faulted for 6 months): -$1200

This totaled to a little over -$250,000 ($258,180 to be more exact).

Now let’s add some context to the story

We’re going back to the end of 2013 when I left my full-time stable career as a Marketing Technologist and decided I wanted to go the route of being a business owner in venture me and my two friends started in custom web design + development. I was 22 at the time with a mortgage and a new car. I was finally independent. I could hold my head up high that my grandmother could finally be happy that I was doing well for myself.

I was ambitious, always worked my ass off for her, and built up some savings. After all, I co-led the growth of the now largest recreational hip-hop dance club back at Queen’s University with what started out with 200 bucks. How hard could it be? It was fucking hard. That’s when it hit me that school is no where near the same as real life.

Fast forward 2 years of running a failed business. Which I should have terminated a year earlier because I wasn’t checking my finances with a ‘hope’ that things will get better. It was at the 1-year marker that I started living passed my means. Looking back, I felt the entitlement that I built up in myself and my past experiences. I will live with that regret and a valuable life lesson for the rest of my life. By no fault of anyone around me or what I did. But my own ego and what I had become. My head was so over inflated that I couldn’t see past it. I was blinded by my own ego.

It was May of 2015. My debt (including my mortgage) totaled a quarter million. Collection agencies were calling me everyday. I skipped out on a tax return. My phone got cut off. My bank was calling me for payments and I was sent an involuntary seizure notice. I was also sent this for my car. It got so bad to the point that collection agencies were just taking money out of my bank account at will that I owed them which put me in a constant cycle of overdraft charges and interest charges because I kept waivering back and forth from negative to positive, negative to positive.

I had a bag of rice left and I was buying $0.33 beef bouillon cubes from the grocery store next door just to add some flavor to my rice.

I was all out of excuses. I was going to be homeless if I didn’t get my act together. At this point, I considered bankruptcy.

I went to my local bank to get a financial advisor to help me figure out what to do. At this point, my ego was damaged but still intact unfortunately. I was desperate.

One financial advisor told me that my situation wasn’t actually that bad. That I could sell my property to get myself back in order and live back in with my grandmother. I had to take a huge step back in life. But my ego told me that the guilt I would feel of losing everything and putting that burden on my grandmother was not an option. So I decided to look for other options.

Thankfully, he also put things into perspective. He told me that it’s good that I’m feeling this now. He told me about a past client of his that was an executive at a large firm (obviously details taken out for confidentiality purposes) that made $350 000/year but racked up close to $2 million in debt and couldn’t get out of it without selling everything or getting a substantial promotion or new salary. The client lived well beyond their means to ‘keep up with the joneses’ and now their family had to suffer. The client was older and had a family of their own. The client was trapped.

So at this point, I made one of the biggest decisions of my life. The hardest pill I ever had to swallow and I never wish this type of pain to your mind and your heart upon anyone. My decision was:

1. I had to put my ego aside that I wasn’t ready for this. I had to get a job and work for someone else.
2. I could try AirBnB since back then, there were no regulations against it in my condo. I was hesitant because it was the only real asset I had and I didn’t want it to get destroyed.
3. Inevitably, I would need to move back in with my grandmother but at least, I wouldn’t lose everything I had which would soften the blow on her and I would need to suck it up, apologize for what I was about to do, and vow to bust my ass off every single day to put myself back up on my feet as quick as possible so she doesn’t bear the burden of me again.

At this point, I never felt so guilty in my life about what I was about to do to my grandmother. She never had time to discover and know who she is. Her entire life was dedicated to raising my aunt and my dad and me when my mom and dad left me until she was 77 years old with barely a dime to her name.

So it happened. I got a job as a Marketing Technologist at 3 companies. I AirBnBed my place and I moved my stuff back in with my grandmother.

I just hunkered down again for 9 months with barely a social life and friends around me. On my off hours from work, I was still doing side projects but out of a coffeeshop down the street since my grandmother’s place didn’t have internet.

After 9 months I was finally out of the hole. I caught up on all my payments for everything and luckily didn’t have to give up anything (except returning my car since the lease was finally over). Well, I did give up my dignity and my ego but that was a lesson well learned.

I’ve been happy, independent, and back in my home again ever since but when I look back, I do have regrets that it ever happened but it’s one of the best things to happen to me early on and here’s why:

1. I learned about balance in life. That there is a silver lining to doing things for yourself versus doing things for others.
2. I learned about compassion and respect for those that have not gone through this phase because of their own egos. That the only way for them to overcome it, is by themselves. They will come out of it a much stronger person than ever before emotionally.
3. I learned that success and happiness is relative.
4. I learned about minimalism and its contribution to people’s emotional state of well-being.
5. I learned to love my grandmother more than ever and I vow to never put her through that state ever again. Which I wrote about in my article titled, “Why I will no longer tell people I’m an “entrepreneur.””
6. I learned what it’s like to hit rock bottom. That I vow to myself to never go back to that hell hole ever again. To be prepared. To be cognizant of it happening.
7. To always surround yourself with people that will push you further and to support those that ask for help (within reason without getting taken advantage of).
8. I’ve learned more about myself than any other life experience could’ve thrown at me (yet).
9. I’ve learned to appreciate what I have.
10. Most importantly, I’ve learned to overcome.

I’m humbled by this experience that it happened to me early on in life rather than into my later years where very few people needed to suffer through this.

Here I am now 4 years later. As a freelance Marketing Architect for 3 years doing what I love to do and what I’m really good at. Finances in order. With a large amount of savings for ‘rainy days or splurges’. Still living a minimalist lifestyle. Living life and growing each and everyday with people I love to work with. It’s not all happy go-lucky as I’m still learning but I’m one step hell of a lot closer to it.

Be Human.™

Andrew Yang. Marketing + Sales Architect + Dance Artist. Be Human.™ https://iamandrewyang.com